Gym Gripes and Grievances

I'm an avid people watcher.

Not in a malicious I-make-fun-of-others-to-feel-better-about-myself kinda way, and I'm not the creepy get-into-my-van-I-have-a-lolly-for-you stalker kind, but more in the curious I-just-find-people-so-fascinating sense.

And the gym is like the ultimate environment for people watching. From the cardio machines on the 2nd level I get a bird's eye view of the gym floor below. And on the main level every wall is made of mirrors which just encourages my surveillance of the gym goers around me.

So I get to observe the interesting fashion choices in gym attire, all the awkward exercise moves, the strange animalistic behaviors, and the unending diversity of human beings that makes people watching so fun.

From all my observations I have begun to compile a mental list of all my gym gripes and pet peeves. And because I always feel better once I have had a chance vent about these things, I'm going to share them all with you :)

1. People who bring Starbucks drinks to the gym

I totally understand that caffeine is a wonderful stimulant. I honestly wouldn't make it through a work out without a little pre-gym pick me up. But stick to re-hydrating with water during your work out. Even if your beverage of choice is a skinny, sugar free latte made with soy milk, it's just wrong to guzzle one at the gym! I don't want to see those little mermaid cups resting in the drink holder on the cardio machines anymore.

2. People who rest for long periods on machines between sets.

I totally understand daydreaming. I'm a terrible day dreamer myself. But I wait until the appropriate time and place to engage in this activity - like in the privacy of my car when I'm driving down the road. (you know that feeling you get when you realize you have no idea how you got somewhere cause you remember nothing about the drive? It's an everyday phenomenon in my life) I believe there should be a 2 min rest limit on all machines at the gym. Or you get zapped. Instead of resting, go do a set of another exercise and then come back to the machine you were going to take a 10 min break on and perform your next set. You'll make better use of your time at the gym and it's just polite gym etiquette for the other people waiting to use it.

3. People who practice imaginary moves in the mirror.

The gym in NOT the place to practice karate and kick boxing moves against an imaginary opponent, perfect your imaginary golf swing, perform your 80s dance moves, pretend your auditioning for american idol by singing loud (and horribly), flex your biceps while making some creepy macho man face, or lift up your shirt to flex and show off your six pack. Unfortunately, these are all real life examples of things I have witnessed. Please spare us all and save these for the privacy of your own home. The whole gym will thank you :)

4. People who grunt, growl, curse, or yell while they lift.

There is a man who works out at our gym I like to call "king kong" (in my head, not to his face) cause he likes to bear his teeth, beat his chest and unleash this animalistic primeval scream while weight lifting. It's quite frightening really. His gutteral outbursts always make me a little scared he's going to kill someone. I do believe you have the right to make some noise during the last few sets of some insane powerful lift, but not with every single move you make, not to be intimidating to others and not because you just want to attract attention. Please try to keep the gym grunts and growls to a minimum.

5. People who wear inappropriate gym attire.

Jeans while jogging, flip flops (with or without socks) in the weight room, pajamas on the leg press, cargo pants during crunches, tighty whities in the pool. It is vitally important to wear gym clothes to the gym. You'll be more comfortable and you'll make less people cringe. We all win :)

So there is my list so far. And please don't be offended if you realize you're guilty of being one of my pet peeve people. Cause I know I have been guilty of some gym grievances too. Like being absolutely mortified after a long, exhausting work out to discover I had a nice large circle of visible butt sweat on the seat of my work out pants. Which brings me to another gym gripe: don't wear anything white!